“Partners in crime” is what comes to mind when you think about Macbeth and Lady Macbeth’s relationship. In the beginning of the story, the two look out for each other. However, what begins as a very sturdy coalition ends in complete disorder.
In the beginning, it's apparent that Macbeth and Lady Macbeth have an honest relationship with no secrecy. He shares everything and emplores her to rejoice that great things have been promised to her. However, we can see that the two are on different ends of the behavioral scale. Based on her response, we can see that Lady Macbeth is controlling, and later on when the two murder King Duncan, she’s ruthless in getting what she desires, while Macbeth himself is kind and loyal - and incredibly stressed after killing the King.
When plotting to kill the king, Lady Macbeth knew her husband didn’t have what it took to do what he needed to do to get the revered position of a King. Since Macbeth clearly has affection for her, Lady Macbeth used this weakness to ask her husband to approach life in a deceitful way. When Macbeth began to give excuses to not kill the king, Lady Macbeth becomes extremely threatening and critical of her husband, and it’s here that we see that Lady Macbeth is the one who makes the decisions.
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Despite her threatening her husband, we still see that Lady Macbeth is incredibly willing to protect her husband. After they succesfully murder the king, Macbeth is so overwhelmed with guilt that he forgets to sneak the daggers into the chamberlains’ room. Lady Macbeth responds by taking the daggers herself and sneaking them into the chamberlains’ room and framing the chamberlain for the murder of the king. We can also see her commitment to her husband when Macduff begins to question the king’s murder. Unconvinced by Macbeth’s explanation on why he killed the chamberlains, Lady Macbeth pretends to faint to distract everyone, including Macduff and forces them to attend to her instead.
We can see the relationship change when Macbeth actually becomes king. He distances himself from everyone, including Lady Macbeth. This is due to his paranoia. He knew getting to the throne was easy, but staying on it was the hard part. Most of the paranoia comes from Banquo, who is “lesser than him, but greater” according to the witches. He plans to murder Banquo and his son, Fleance, so that Banquo’s descendants could never have the throne. We can see in Act 3, Scene 1, that honesty that they had before Macbeth became king is no longer there when he plans to kill Banquo and his son without consulting her. Macbeth’s behavior does a 180, and the cowardice he had was replaced by ruthlessness. He’s in control, and his wife is no longer his “partner in crime.” Despite this, Lady Macbeth still shows unwavering loyalty.
Their love becomes more of a facade to impress guests. Whatever is left of Lady Macbeth’s autocratic nature is seen when she tries to pressure Macbeth into acting manly and civilized in front of the guests, but it does not work. We can see that she still cares for him by sending everyone at the banquet away when Macbeth begins to ramble about Banquo’s ghost.
With Macbeth out of her life, Lady Macbeth becomes depressed as Macbeth makes no time for her anymore. This state of isolation is something she becomes overcome with guilt in, and that guilt makes her mentally unstable as seen in her sleepwalking incidences when she tries to wash her hands, but can’t. Macbeth doesn’t even take her condition seriously and only orders the doctor to cure her of her illusions and nothing more. Lady Macbeth eventually commits suicide, and surprisingly, Macbeth doesn’t go into any form of mourning; he only mutters about life being “a flickering candle” and “a series of phases.”
Macbeth proves that though he was very strong and courageous, he wasn’t as great a thinker as his late wife. When she commited suicide, he had lost a great ally even though he wouldn’t admit it. She complimented him where he was weak, and their combined abilities allowed them to take power very easily. When he began to undermine his wife, his downfall was soon to come. When they started operating separately is when their weaknesses began to show.
Male and Female expectations in a Relationship
Relationships are an integral part of human beings especially given the fact that human beings are social beings who need love, care and recognition. The quality of relationship couples as well as members of the opposite sex have, has been found to have an impact on one’s health (Jamieson, 1998). Human beings show the need for affection and healthy relationships from an early age in life. As early as childhood, toddlers get attracted to their mothers or caregivers. This makes the toddler to feel threatened if separated from the parents.
Surprisingly, this attraction to people and the need for ‘others’ never change and goes on in life throughout all the developmental stages. As early as the adolescence developmental stage, boys and girls exhibit feelings of attraction to each other. Although some go into denial and opt to suppress the feelings for the opposite sex, the attraction and the craving for the other sex is usually very high. Eventually many realize that female-male relationships are inevitable.
Questions as to what expectations both parties have for each other as well as from the relationship are to date a subject for debate. There are many expectations each party expects of the relationship and the expectations are largely shaped by environmental conditions although the role played by genetical factors cannot be underestimated. Most of the expectations however arise out of social and cultural influence.
As men and women grow up, they are taught by the society on how to carry themselves in relationships as well as what to expect from their partners. While some societies expect relationships to remain autonomous, in the past society played a very crucial role. In some societies, males expect women to bear them children for purposes of posterity. In such relationships, a female is respected on the basis of her ability to sire children for the man.
Any female who is not capable of siring children is discriminated against and treated with dishonor. As such, a barren woman risks being branded an outcast and a social misfit. In some cultures, the man expects sexual satisfaction from the woman they are in a relationship with. Women who cannot sexually satisfy their men are abused and in some cases divorced or neglected. Modernity has changed the expectations men expect of women and vice versa, as the focus in relationship shifts from the need for procreation to the need for caring and loving partners.
Fidelity ranks highly in relationships. According to (Jamieson, 1998) 80% females in relationships consider fidelity as the most important factor in relationships with 40% of the females saying that they would quit a relationship if they found out a partner was cheating on them. 90% of men consider fidelity as the most important factor in relationships compared to 80% of women who consider fidelity as the most important factor.
Asked on whether they would quit a relationship on basis of unfaithfulness of a partner, 85% of the men said that they would quit a relationship on the basis of fidelity. The study concluded that, fidelity ranks highly amongst expectations in female and male relationships. Other factors, which the study found to form basis of expectations in a relationship, include; care, love, financial support, sexual satisfaction as well as respect (Jamieson, 1998). While the above expectations apply to both men and women, some expectations are cited more often by males than females and vice versa.
For instance, females in relationships are more likely to expect financial support or help form their male partners. This can be explained in a number of ways but most importantly, cultural and social factors are at play here. In most societies, women were purposely seen as useful only for reproductive jobs (which are not salaried) (Jamieson, 1998). By being subjected to heavy work loads such as cultivation in family gardens, most women especially housewives were left with no steady source of income and were therefore left with no choice but to depend on males with whom they had entered into relationships for financial help. This puts females at a disadvantage in a relationship as they are wrongly viewed as dependent on their men.
In some cases males end up dominating over the females on this basis as males take the role of ‘breadwinner’ and the females that of ‘caregivers’. This labeling takes place regardless of the fact that, the woman is also a ‘breadwinner’ in the sense that the domestic chores the woman is allocated such as looking after children as well as taking the children to school are important but it is the society which has chosen to give them less prominence. Therefore, women’s reproductive work is not considered as work and is considered as less important by the society and the men in particular.
Variations in male-female expectations in a relationship also result from cultural beliefs. In some communities, women are labelled as the weaker sex. Such categorization leads to variation in roles and expectations. With exception of very few relationships, females and males are not equal in a relationship. In most cases, male dominance is manifested in relationships.
Females are expected to be submissive and to give in or compromise their opinions or decisions in cases where important decisions are to be made affecting the relationship. In other relationships, female dominance is experienced. This is usually common in cases where women have financial independence and therefore have a fallback position. For such women, moving out of relationships for reasons such as abuse in the relationship by the partner or irreconcilable differences existing between partners in the relationship is the common response.
In female dominated relationships, expectations for both parties are likely to be different from those of a male dominated relationship. In such relationships, males expect financial support from the women. Males also expect sex from the females but they are more likely to adhere to consensual terms or the decisions of the female. In female dominated relationships, females expect obedience form the male especially in cases whereby the females are the providers (Jamieson, 1998).
Females in such relationships also expect other needs of a relationship such as respect, love, and care. For most relationships, expectations change from time to time an also on the prevailing conditions. Loss of a job for either the male or the female partner may influence the balance of power in the relationship. For instance, if the male has been the decision maker in a relationship and ends up losing the status of a bread-winner, expectations for the females are affected especially due to the fact that most expectations are pegged on financial ability of either partner.
Conclusion
Female and male relationships are complex and understanding of expectations both male and females have of each other is a daunting task. The fact that relationships are both dynamic and situational further complicates the nature of relationships. However, as discussed in the main body of this paper, social, environmental and cultural factors influence greatly what females and males expect out of a relationship.
Reference
Jamieson, L. (1998) Intimacy. Personal Relationships in Modern Societies, Cambridge: Polity Press.
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Peer Relationships
Having arrived at the gateway to adulthood, the teenage years are an exciting time of freedom, no responsibilities, and supposedly the best time of your life; unfortunately it is not always a cake walk. Whether it is maintaining good grades or keeping up with what the plans are for the weekend, there is a serious amount of pressure throughout high school and it becomes easy to get lost in the madness. Studies show that the qualities of peer relationships at this time are key contributors to mental health now and throughout life.
Positive relationships are beneficial to young adults because it helps in gaining a sense of what good social interactions are and produces equal or greater relationships in the future. On the flip side, poor peer relationships can have negative effects on adulthood mental health and social relations. Unforgiving social cliques and high societal expectations are a few causes of the shrinking of teen self-esteem and disruption of stable mental well-being. When students start high school they quickly find their place on the social ladder.
Some students find themselves at to top, some find a place in the middle they’re comfortable with, and others are sometimes cast out and pushed to the bottom by the rest. Social status and cliques rank unnecessarily high in importance amongst adolescents; teens are consistently pressured to maintain their high social standing. This chronic stress leads to their disengagement from classroom activities (McGrath ; Noble, 2010). Even pupils that seem to be at the top of their social ladder develop conflict among one another, disrupting school performance.
These students become more focused on the trifling drama and maintaining social stature and find the importance of school beginning to decline. Research conducted by Helen McGrath and Toni Noble shows that, young adults that have poor relationships with their peers, show lower levels of school achievement and higher levels of school avoidance. Once teenagers’ attention is elsewhere in the classroom, they begin to fall behind on school work due to the fact that they are more focused on their life outside of school.
Bad study habits can develop if they are engrossed in their social life and they can carry those bad study habits with them through high school to college. Pupils with high social standing are not the only ones affected by negative peer relationships; it influences students at the bottom of the social ladder as well. The so called “bottom” of the social ladder is made up of persons that have often times been rejected by their peers for one reason or another; they may dress different, act a certain way, or lack some sort of attribute that society believes is necessary.
Students that are excluded from their peers still seek the same social fulfillment as others; in a way this causes them to be more desperate for that fulfillment. Being bullied by social exclusion may appear less visibly harmful than verbal or physical forms of bullying but may be more detrimental to children’s participation in learning activities and have more impact on their academic outcomes, states McGrath and Noble.
Social exclusion and bullying can go even further than classroom disengagement; as a result of bullying, people can lose their ability to love and trust, denying them the chance to experience a quality relationship later in their life. They might find themselves as a submissive partner or they may want to be completely alone. Aside from its long-term effects, some consequences of bullying can be seen and felt immediately. When one calls another a harsh name, the victim might cry, just like a bruise might appear after a punch to the arm. However, some effects of bullying are not always obvious to the naked eye.
The results of bullying might grow and appear over time, damaging a person in profound ways for the long term. Victims often develop eating disorders, begin to self-injure, or require extensive counseling. Social bullying can also leave people without a supportive group of friends that they can lean on and spend time with. Isolation amongst peers has negative repercussions towards young adult mental health because at this age, according to Kingsly Nyarko of the University of Ghana’s psychology department, being accepted by peers has important implications for adjustment both during adolescence and into adulthood.
Friends are supporters and motivators, they help you feel better when you’re sad and can talk you through any problems you are facing. When that support is missing from a person’s life, they have no one to talk to, making them feel alone and excluded. This can damage an adolescent’s ability to maintain healthy friendships and possess adequate social skills. Being teased, rejected or socially excluded by other pupils on an ongoing basis has been identified as the single most common characteristic of children who are at high risk for developing emotional and behavioral disorders (McGrath ; Noble, 2010).
Isolation makes adolescents feel as if there is something wrong with them, thus lowering self-esteem and creating disorders such as anorexia, depression, anxiety and bipolar disorders. Some individuals recover from loneliness by using their own strategies, or by letting time do the healing. Others require outside professional help. The most obvious approach is to help people develop satisfying personal relationships. This can be done by improving how they interact with others through social skills training or forms of psychotherapy aimed at changing dysfunctional interpersonal dispositions (e. g. fear of rejection). It can also be done by improving opportunities for interactions through programs aimed at removing barriers for social interaction (e. g. , providing transportation) or at bringing people together (e. g. , discussion groups). Major depressive disorders in early adulthood range from 10%-17% (Maughan ; Collishaw ; Stringaris, 2012). One of the biggest issues for teens is fitting in. Society tells young adults that they need to act a certain way or look a certain way, and when a teen doesn’t feel they follow that socially acceptable conduct, they often become repressed within themselves.
They want to be accepted and there is a fear of being alone and not being wanted. Popularity is a huge social factor for any teen, especially in High School. Everyone wants to be part of the "in crowd" and if you cannot be a part of them, you want to dress like them or act like them. Pressures like this do tend to be worse for girls; about twice as likely to be affected as men (Maughan et al. , 2012). Girls feel the need to please others and seek approval while boys learn that it is ok to be themselves and do their own thing.
Boys tend to be able to deal better with these social issues then girls do. They are able to put events behind them, and not depend upon others for reassuring them of their self-worth. One example is when an adolescent boy and girl are equally interested in each other; the boys seem to be able to cope with love's losses better than girls do. They put it behind them and move on, while girls focus on the breakup and keep talking about it, stirring the emotional pot. These depressive episodes are not just short term; 50-70% are likely to develop a further episode within five years (Maughan et al. 2012). However, sometimes depression can be avoided all together. Having a good home life and a high self-esteem would be primary for people not to be depressed. Although in some cases you are predisposition to have depression, little things do help. Talking about your problems and not bottling them up helps immensely to avoid emotional breakdowns and blowups. Avoiding extreme “stressers,” like putting yourself in a situation you cannot get out of, also helps. Avoidance of cigarettes and alcohol also helps with staying healthy and happy.
Despite the vast amount of negative effects peer relationships have on young adults there are a substantial amount of positive effects as well. When healthy peer relationships are established early on, they positively affect every aspect of everyday life; one facet being school attendance and performance. The link between pupil engagement, achievement and well-being appears to is bi-directional, i. e. the more pupils are actively engaged and achieving in learning, the greater their sense of well-being and vice versa (McGrath ; Noble, 2010).
When students are treated well by other pupils it makes them more enthused about participation in school activities. Positive peer relationships are also linked to higher levels of school attendance and pupil engagement with learning and a reduction in the likelihood of dropping out in secondary school (McGrath ; Noble, 2008). When students find their school environment to be supportive and caring, they are less likely to become involved in substance abuse, violence, and other problem behaviors.
They are more likely to develop positive attitudes toward themselves and pro-social attitudes and behaviors toward others; supportive schools foster these positive outcomes by promoting students’ sense of “connectedness”, “belongingness”, or “community” during the school day. Additionally, this time during adolescence is imperative because, the development of strong interpersonal skills and relationships during emerging adulthood is an essential component of effective career and role functioning throughout the adult life p.
Comments by others, particularly parents and peers, reflect appraisals of the individual that some adolescents may incorporate as part of their identity and feelings about themselves (Nyarko, 2012). Negative experiences in early adulthood are often particularly damaging to self-esteem. In early years, personality and sense of self is being formed, and harmful experiences can leave one feeling that they are not valued or important.
Even though one is close to adulthood, there has still been too little amount of time to build any resilience, so these negative views can become the ones that teens believe about themselves. The way one may view them self can be tainted by society’s ideas of ‘beauty’; this is where helpful friendships are essential. When a teen’s self-esteem is disintegrating they need constructive re-affirmation to keep a positive attitude; this can be accomplished through strong friendships.
Frequently, the friendships we make during our youth fade or dwindle as we grow up and move on to new places in life. Yet when our childhood and school-year friends stay with us into adulthood, they are often the most important friends we have. Our common history and the length of time that our connection has continued becomes the glue that keeps us together, even if we’ve changed significantly from when we first met. Our most valuable friends are the ones with whom we feel the deepest connection and greatest trust.
It is with these friends that we share our fears, secrets, desires and problems and dreams. There are many unexpected benefits from this type of relationship, including such things as lessening stress, limiting depression, lowering blood pressure, keeping our minds agile, and lessening the debilitating effects of old age. Research has even shown that people with close friendships are more likely to exercise regularly, avoid excessive alcohol and even be more inclined to quit smoking. Positive peer relationships in early adulthood have positive effects on self-esteem.
Chen, Cohen, Johson, and Kasen (2008) summary article on Psychiatric disorders during adolescence and relationships with peers found that, during adolescence, friends are providers of companionship, social and emotional support, and intimate self-disclosure and reflection. Group activities such as sports are an effective way to gain self-esteem boosting encouragement and relationships. Being involved in a team allows teens to build relationships and social skills that will help them further in life. Other group activities such as school extracurriculars have similar constructive effects on teen contentment.
Peer relationships play an important role in pshyco-social development and well-being throughout life (Chen et al. , 2008). Young adults’ body image often times can be influenced by their relationship with peers. For some it is viewed as the lowest point in their life; others claim it to be the highlight of their years. No matter what personal opinion individuals express, it is evident that early adulthood is a key turning point in life. The experiences at this time, positive or negative, set the very foundation for later adulthood.
Young Love and Relationships
Young Love and Relationships Everybody feels love at one time or another, be it a love for a family member or a friend. Some people fall in and out of love on a regular basis while others take time to find just the right one. Everyone experiences this differently. Love between two people is distinct and exceptional. Although being in love with someone is easy and free, love is still a powerful emotion that can build and destroy. Since majority of the youth in our society start with their first love and relationship at the age of thirteen, many are also fooled.
Many confuse true love with infatuation. Although this is not entirely a bad thing, still many are often caught in sticky situations. (i. e. Pre-marital Sex, Teenage Pregnancy, Heartbreak, Suicide) Objectively, Webster says that the meaning of true love is a sweetheart or a truly loving or loved person. Furthermore more, Webster also defines relationships as an emotional and sexual association between two people. As for me, I believe that true love and relationships are the ones that God continuously give us. In 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 (NIV), it is said that "Love is patient; love is kind.
It does not envy; it does not boast; it is not proud. It is not rude; it is not self-seeking; it is not easily angered; it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight on evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects; always trusts; always hopes; always perseveres. " True love is often confused with romantic love (infatuation) since both are all consuming and overwhelming, and if teenagers are not guided well, things can spiral out of hand. But when guided and founded with the will of God, years would go by as love develops into a real and secure emotional.
The verse stated above shows what true love is really about. True love never asks for anything in return; it never gets tired of giving. But amidst all these, giving still has its boundaries. That is why everybody, mainly teens should know that unconditional love has nothing to do with sex, exploitation or subjugation. Right now, teenage girls around the world are getting pregnant because they thought having sex with their boyfriend proves love. But what did they get? Being left behind, an ounce of heartbreak and a baby to take care of at such a young age.
Was getting their lives destroyed worth the few hours of pleasure in bed? I believe not. However, some are pressured into marriage as a sense of responsibility, but statistics show that although things may start like a fairytale, ninety percent of the teens that get married due to unplanned pregnancy get divorced or separated within a p of six years. You see, there is a right time for everything, for real love waits for that. Love never fails to forgive and it sacrifices for the other, but these sacrifices should have its limits – one that would ensure that no one gets hurt.
Shakespeare, one of the greatest playwright and love advocate, compared romantic love to being intoxicated in his play "The Tempest". Romantic love often clouds a person's judgment causing him to be confused on what the right decisions should be. It is like drug or alcohol that it takes over all the person's senses, somehow causing him to make many big decisions with all the wrong motives. Most of the time, lovers base their decisions on each other considering how they can be of help to each other. Together, they continuously grow emotionally and spiritually.
Now, don't get me wrong. There is a big difference between depending on each other for the better and not being able to live without the other. The latter is a mere infatuation or romantic love. For example, a person in a long term and serious relationship gets offered his dream job, but the job requires him to move to another country, thus leaving his partner behind. The person being left behind would probably force the other to stay and because romantic love can be really selfless, he would stay. And what if he chooses to leave? What would you do?
Would you stop living your life just because the other chose to live his dreams? In real love, both should be encouraging each other to fulfill their dreams whether or not they do it side by side or far away from each other. Love can wait. If two people are meant for each other God will make a way because the will of God can never be broken. He will be the One opening doors for the two persons to meet. Arnel Pineda once sang a song with the lyrics "too much love can kill you", and indeed it can. In a relationship, be it just a fling or a serious one, we can never be sure if that relationship would last.
We are never sure if the person we are with right now is the person we are going to be with in the next ten or twenty years. And when we love someone too much, we believe that we cannot live life without him. That is why losing him may cause us to stop living our lives. This is not real love. Just like an old saying being passed around for centuries, “Too much of anything is bad. ” This proves that truly loving someone should never be too much because true love does not cause harm, but instead brings harmony. Furthermore, True love is selfless; infatuation is too much.
Since romantic love is extremely selfless, a person may sacrifice everything and simply live his life for the other. This is wrong because any relationship is not exceptional from conflicts. And to top it all, we don't know for sure if this person we are having a relationship with, is the one we would last with. That is why a relationship should have a strong foundation with God. It has to continuously grow according to God's commands and laws. We also have to be able to have something in our personal life to back us up. Something that would keep us busy if anything goes wrong with the relationship. i. e. Spiritual Lives, Family and Friends, School Organizations, Work)Loving and having relationships is really hard to understand. When our heart unites with another, we feel a strong connection being formed. But when the connection is cut without understanding, the results can be disastrous. (i. e. Suicide) These kinds of incidents can be avoided if we take time to reflect and slowly grow as wisdom and understanding comes. In our generation today, teens often rush into relationships without building a strong foundation to be able handle them.
A heart without enough strength to handle the trials of a relationship is like standing on thin ice forcing it not to break. But no matter how hard we try to stop it from breaking, it will crack. That is why, love and relationships should not be rushed because there are many trials and situations that only time can face and overcome. Therefore, losing someone we love should not stop us from living because there is someone better, destined by the will of God, to be with us. Love comes with a lot of perks, but at the same time comes with great responsibility and understanding.
There are numerous kinds of things a misguided love or relationship can cause, be it suicide, murder or pregnancy. These points must be taken into serious considerations to prevent people from committing the same mistakes over and over again. This is also for the youth to be more guided when it comes to loving and relationships because many young lives are at risk when it comes to an unguided relationship. That is why the youth should always be guided and must know all these responsibilities in order to have a good relationship, and of course, one that will develop to grow and last.
Moreover, love is one of the most amazing feelings a person can feel if used in the right way. And in the end, love will always be a powerful force. Whether we let it work its magic or try to repress it, love is still and always will be an inevitable force that binds us all. Source: Dictionary meaning of true love. Retrieved from: http://www. merriam-webster. com/ Bible Verse. Retrieved from: http://www. biblegateway. com/ (2013). Marriage. Retrieved from: http://www. pregnancyoutreach. org/articles/marriage
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