Anger Management

Anger is an emotion we have all displayed every once in a while. However, when the anger gets out of control it is time to seek therapy. Here are some suggestions on how to handle anger management problems and how cognitive therapy may help. Controlling oneis anger is something we all have to deal with at some point. Yes, we tend to get angry with our spouse, the kids, co-workers and bosses. Or we vent our anger in situations involving motorists, or simply when someone pushes the wrong buttons.

Anger management control via cognitive therapy is one way in which we can understand where the anger is coming from and how to effectively deal with any given situation in an appropriate and non-combative manner. In cognitive therapy sessions, certain techniques are utilized. These include relaxation methods and visualization techniques which allow the person to use certain images or words to relax when the anger inside rears its ugly head. For example, road rage has become quite prevalent in our society.

One of the methods used in anger management is to have the person visualize an instance wherein they become angry at another motorist, and then use the relaxation methods to rid themselves of that anger. In cognitive therapy, psychologists offer different ways for patients to react to the anger. For example, they may ask the patient to look at a situation in a more appropriate and positive manner instead of flying off the handle in a negative way. There are several ways in which psychologists may use these techniques. The first is assisting their patients to become more aware of their anger.

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Secondly, they may show the patients how to avoid situations in which they can become angry. Thirdly, teaching patients how to recognize what exactly causes the anger. And finally, offering a plan that the patients can utilize to change the way they react to others and avoid situations that trigger the anger to begin with. The one thing that is emphasized by psychologists is that for any treatment to be effective, it should not entail a person ranting and raving about all of the things that make him or her angry. Instead, focusing on the cues that trigger the anger and utilizing relaxation techniques has been viewed as widely effective.

While research is still ongoing to determine the underlying cause of anger, cognitive therapy is one method that is effective in controlling and monitoring such behavior. We all get angry, but it is how we deal with the anger that separates those who need anger management from those who do not. How many of you are guilty of yelling at your kids? If you are a yeller, these easy strategies to stop yelling at your kids may provide you with the help you need to change your yelling habits. For anyone who does yell at their kids, you know it’s a hard habit to break.

You may be so used to yelling that you don’t even realize you’re doing it. Remember your children will learn more by example than what is told or explained to them. So if you yell a lot, your children are more likely to follow suit. Once you’ve broken that cycle of yelling, you’ll find life as a family is much calmer. Are your children loud? You may have started yelling out of necessity so you would be heard. However, in many cases, yelling is done to release frustrations. No matter the reason for it, many parents who yell are embarrassed and wish things could change. Plan ahead. You know your children are going to frustrate you at some point, so plan ahead how you will handle it. Pay attention to the warning signs such as clenching your teeth or fists, a slight raise to your voice or possibly shaking. * Ask for help. Allow them to give you a signal if your voice begins getting louder. This could be a ‘catch phrase’ which someone not in-the-know won’t understand but you will recognize it as a clue to control yourself. * Develop coping mechanisms. Walk out of the room, take a deep breath or count to ten.

Find a coping mechanism that works for you and continue using it when you realize you’re about to yell. Some people snap a rubber band which is around their wrist. * Think about your child’s temper tantrums. Why do they have a meltdown? They’re tired, hungry or frustrated. Are you experiencing the same things? * Pay attention to the times you’re more liable to yell. Perhaps you yell when you’re more stressed than usual. Once you understand when you yell, you’ll be better able to avoid those situations. * Find new ways to get your children’s attention. Don’t yell if your children aren’t paying attention to you.

Use a whistle, stand on a chair or try anything out of the ordinary. * If all else fails, seek professional help. Some people have a hard time breaking habits and yelling is one of them. Speak to someone who can hold you accountable or a professional who deals with anger management. They may be able to provide you with the help you need. There are many reasons to stop yelling. It could affect your children’s self-esteem and it causes your blood pressure to rise. Using these easy strategies to stop yelling at your kids, you can change the dynamics of your home from stressful to peaceful.

Give it a try and see if these methods work for you. One type of free anger management activity is relaxation, where the individual learns different techniques to help him to relax and calm down before saying or doing anything rash. Deep breathing is one technique individuals can use where they concentrate on breathing deeply in through the nose and out through the mouth, taking a minute to calm down. This breathing should be done through the diaphragm, which means the air should be pulled down toward the gut rather than just through the chest.

While breathing, the individual can say a calming word or phrase to himself such as "calm down" and can picture a soothing scene or person in his mind. Exercise is another free anger management activity that individuals can use to calm down. This does not mean that an individual has to go to a sports gym, but can merely take a time out where he or she walks down the hallway or around the building a coupe of times to get some fresh air, expend some energy, breathe and work to calm down. Another free anger management activity is to work on changing the way a person thinks when he becomes irritated.

This includes changing inner thoughts to more constructive patterns such as reminding himself that getting angry does not help or change anything about a situation, only finding a solution or resolution to the situation is helpful. Using a journal or notebook during this phase or reconditioning in free anger management activities can be helpful since some individuals process their thoughts better when written out on paper where they can review them to see which ones are rational and which ones might need to be re-evaluated.

In addition to these free anger management activities, it is also wise to plan some fun time into every day so that the individual has time to unwind and let loose of all the burdens that he has been carrying over the course of the day. Many angry people are really at the root stressed out, feeling like they cannot carry any more burdens on their shoulders so that the least irritations seem huge and lead them to anger. Reducing stress also reduces anger in these people and building in personal time can help with this.

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