Romantic Love Is a Poor Basis for Marriage

Romantic love is a poor basis for marriage. Many songs had been written about romantic love, and a lot of books had been devoted to this topic. Up to now this is still a favorite theme for many movies and publications. But what is this in the real life, and how does romantic love affect a relationship between man and woman, and especially in marriage? What Romantic Love and True Love really are? Let’s look on this more carefully and try to answer on these questions. It’s difficult to disagree that falling in love is a very wonderful feeling.

It seems like wings suddenly grow on your back, and the world shrinks where it is only you and your love, and you would give everything to keep this feeling forever. When I felt this feeling the first time, it was something amazing and indescribable. However, for me this feeling didn’t last long, and usually disappeared in several months. Now I’m married; is this feeling still alive in my marriage? We will see this later. Sometimes people say that love is blinding. Is it true, or more correctly, is it love?

I will not say that romantic love is always something negative. No, it’s a wonderful feeling, and it’s very good if partners have it in a marriage. However, can we build our own future family only on these feelings? I think, the best way for the family is if these feelings grow up in true mutual love in the marriage. On the other hand, what do we do if this doesn’t happen? Unfortunately, life shows in most cases that this romantic love ends after the wedding, and everyday life begins with its usual joys and troubles.

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You may say to me that it’s not your case, and in your life all will be perfect. Maybe it is true, as I also thought that way before my own marriage, but now I have changed my mind. It's good for all to be prepared for this. When romantic love ends after the wedding, what remains after it? Now we have approached to the definition of what True Love really is in my opinion. I think, that true love it is not feeling, but it is a choice.

When we decided to get married, we gave a promise to love each other forever, and this means that we cannot stop loving one another anymore. If our relations based only in romantic love, then when we live together we will see many differences and many weaknesses are inside one another. We can become disappointed with our decision to make this marriage. However, if we will know that true love is a choice, we can’t return back, and we will be more responsible for our decisions to get married. So, as we can see, romantic love is a poor basis for marriage.

This foundation is not strong enough to stand against many difficulties, which we will meet in everyday life in marriage. We have to have the strong decision inside us that in any situation, with any obstacle against us, we will continue to love our spouses. This means that we will continue to respect, to understand, to seek not our will, but our spouse’s. We will continue to try please each other and sometimes even to give up our selfish desires. And then our marriage will be strong and lasting, and we will be together until death do us apart.

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