What does respect mean? Most people have a hard time understanding the concept of respect. Merriam Webster Dictionary defines respect as “a relation or reference to a particular thing or situation or the act of giving special attention.” Because respect varies from one individual to another, the dictionary definition omits the importance of respect everywhere in society. People need to have self-respect and respect for others, as well as respect for social standards, laws, and the environment. Most parents teach their small children to respect authority and show politeness and courtesy by saying: please, thank you, excuse me, you are welcome, yes sir, and no sir. Although these things are important, children need to learn to be considerate, compassionate, thoughtful, and tolerant of other people. Rudeness toward parents, teachers, or a store clerk is being disrespectful. If nations are ever to have a cohesive and harmonious society, they need to respect other peoples’ strengths and weaknesses and not be prejudiced against them because of their race, culture, age, or religion.
According to an article posted by the Council on Quality Leadership, people form their view of respect through personal experiences which are influenced by personal preferences, emotions, and culture. In order to understand other peoples’ respect expectation, the article says people have to communicate and exchange ideas and opinions with others. People need to ask questions, so they can better understand other peoples’ position. Listening to other peoples’ answers will help everyone understand another person’s beliefs and values and help develop respectful relationships. Another good way to demonstrate respect for others is to be polite, kind, and considerate of their point of view. People should value others’ ideas and not try to change peoples’ views when they do not agree with them. People should be able to give their point-of-view without feeling threatened or humiliated. It is important to model respect when we talk to others. When Justice Sonia Sotomayor spoke to a group of Albany Law School students about the importance of self-respect, respect for others, and respect for the legal system, Andrew Ayers said Sotomayor modeled respect throughout her speech. He said that she made eye contact with the students, as she moved around the room answering the student’s questions, and he noted that students discussed respect for weeks after her speech.
If people want others to respect them, they have to respect other peoples’ behaviors, feelings, needs, and thoughts. Some of the ways to show respect for others are expressing appreciation, acknowledging dignity, making compromises, watching our body language, keeping promises, showing kindness, and taking responsibility for our own actions (Daskal). They should also respect laws, property, and the environment by not disobeying the speed limit, stealing things, writing on school property, or throwing trash on the ground. If a person borrows a wrench or lawnmower from his neighbor, he should return it in the same condition as it was when he borrowed it. Before a person can respect others, they must have self-respect. In order to have self-respect, people have to learn to accept the beliefs of others, take personal responsibility for their conduct, and learn how to apologize when they are wrong.
Thompson, Sylvester, and Ahern said: “Respect, how we treat other, is ultimately a condition of our heart,” and “Who we are on the inside matters most because who we are on the inside influences what we do on the outside”. An international company recently started a respect challenge for its employees by asking them this question. “What does respect look like to you?” Chuck Bohn, President of BL Harbert International, said that the company wants its employees to “respect all of humanity, not only at work, but in the local communities as well”. The company wants all employees to respect the differences in social and personal customs of other cultures and realize the employees have more similarities than differences. To be able to do this, each employee has to identify his own personal view of respect.
A survey conducted by the Center for Creative Leadership found that “treating people with respect on a daily basis was rated as one of the most helpful things a leader can do to address conflict or tension” (“The Power of Respect”). Diversity in the workplace requires an understanding of other cultures because are so many different cultures represented in every work environment. People should not judge others by their personal conduct standards. In some Native American cultures, it is disrespectful to look another person in the eye when they are being addressed. Some teachers or bosses might take this as a sign of disrespect; however, this is part of the Native American culture. In some cultures, it is disrespectful to address someone by their first name, and in other cultures pointing directly at someone is disrespectful. People cannot say someone is being disrespectful just because they are acting in a way that is unfamiliar to them. They should not judge other peoples’ actions as wrong until they understand the other peoples’ cultural social rules. They should not make hasty judgments or try to impose their beliefs on others.
Ultimately, a person’s attitudes, motives, morals, and inner thoughts make up their character and determine how they treat others. Therefore, understanding the meaning of respect is difficult because the concept means something different for each individual. Self-respect and respect for others, respect for laws, respect for property, and respect for the environment have to begin within each individual person. Perhaps the only way to do this is to heed the lyrics of Aretha Franklin’s song: “R-E-S-P-E-C-T: Find out what it means to me”. Although every person’s view of respect is influenced by his/her parents, early childhood experiences, school, and culture, people have to continually expand their experiences and learn to respect the opinions and beliefs of others. Without respect, society would be total chaos.
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