Is gender predetermined or learned? In today's complex society, the definition of gender is elusive. Stereotypical notions of femininity and masculinity have persisted for centuries, but not everyone conforms to these expectations. Women are not obligated to wear dresses or enjoy shopping, nor are men required to be athletic and rugged. David Sedaris, in his essay "Rooster at the Hitchin' Post," uses himself and his brother as examples to argue that gender is a matter of personal choice.
I can see where you're coming from as I, too, had similar experiences as a child, struggling to meet my mother's expectations of femininity while my brother was seen as the epitome of a perfect child. In his essay "Rooster and the Hitchin' Post," David Sedaris discusses how he and his brother were raised. Sedaris was clean, articulate, and emotionally aware, whereas Paul was rough, unemotional, and loved playing sports.
Despite Sedaris and his sisters' efforts, Paul was the ideal son their father had always wanted, as he loved sports and spent time outside with his dad. Meanwhile, Sedaris enjoyed the company of his mother and sisters, relishing meaningful conversations and having impeccable manners. Paul and their father bonded over their shared interests, but Sedaris always felt out of place when trying to connect with them.
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As a child, my mother tried to shape me into her ideal girl, who spent most of her time in the kitchen and spent weekends experimenting with nail polish and hairstyles. Similarly, Sedaris's father attempted to mold him into a "man's man" by engaging him in masculine activities like sports. Despite my pink room filled with dolls and Barbies, I found myself gravitating towards my brother's hot wheels and monster trucks, much to my mother's dismay.
She disapproved of my destructive tendencies, but I just wished she would buy me toys that I actually enjoyed. As a teenager, I preferred the company of boys and found it easier to connect with them. My mother disapproved of my male friends and lamented that I was not interested in typical feminine pursuits like slumber parties.
Instead, I joined the JROTC in high school, competing in raider and drill teams, running through water-filled trenches and spinning a heavy rifle. It became my passion, but my mother could never fully comprehend it. Like Sedaris and his father, my mother and I struggled to connect over shared interests. Both Sedaris and I failed to live up to our parents' expectations, while our brothers embodied their ideals of a perfect child.
Paul was a typical guy who loved sports and bonded well with his father, while my brother Brandon was the epitome of my mother's ideal daughter who loved cooking, shopping, and spending time with her. However, I was quite different from them and preferred playing sports and going to military functions with my father. Similar to Sedaris, I spent most of my time with my father and had a hard time bonding with my mother and brother.
As I grew older, I followed in my father's footsteps and joined the U.S Army, while my brother became a professional chef, which my mother was proud of. Similarly, Sedaris's brother fulfilled their father's dream by going into construction and starting his own business. We both believe that gender is inherent, and no amount of effort can change a person's inherent tendencies. A person's gender is based on their personal aspirations and cannot be changed by external influences.
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“Rooster at the Hitchin’ Post” Gender Analyisis. (2023, Feb 26). Retrieved from https://phdessay.com/rooster-at-the-hitchin-post-gender-analyisis/
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