Last Updated 12 Mar 2023

Review of “Berger Queen” by Erin Sharp

Essay type Review
Words 293 (2 pages)
Views 10

In her essay, “Berger Queen”, freelance writer Erin Sharp expounds on her experience working at McDonald’s. Sometimes seen as a less than desirable occupation, Sharp defers and states that this has been the most enjoyable job that she’s had. She opens her essay this way, in paragraph one, in narrative fashion. The rest of the essay is narrative with use of illustration by examples. The paragraphs that show illustration are three, four, five, six, and seven (all of the body paragraphs).

Paragraph three uses the example of children passing notes to McDonald’s employees to pass on to Ronald McDonald, proving her point that McDonald’s is a favorite spot for most children. Paragraph four and five support the point that most adults lack respect for McDonald’s employees, going so far as to try to get free food from them, arguing over ten cent increases, and just acting absolutely ridiculous by doing things such as complaining about cold food an hour after it was served and demanding that accommodations be made for an item that was not on the menu (ie…lunch item during breakfast).

Paragraph six goes on to further explain how adults treat McDonald’s employees with such a lack of respect and just how foolish people can really by. Sharp recalls a woman sitting in the drive thru eating her pancakes and sausage at the drive thru window while several vehicles sat behind her honking during a 90 second or less guarantee day. The essay ends on a brighter note, with the reassurance that all of McDonald’s customers do not treat the employees with a lack of respect; there are groups who look forward to coming to McDonalds every day to have their coffee and social time.

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Writing Quality

Grammar mistakes

D (69%)


B (89%)

Redundant words

C (75%)


F (51%)

Total mark


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