Counseling and psychotherapy

When two people are head-over-heels in love with each other, the immediate decision that comes up in each mind is marriage. Marriage is a very exciting phase in one’s life. It challenges one’s capacity and ability to handle responsibilities (responsibilities for the children’s education and future and the obligations of spouses with each other especially in their sexual life) for the future family that will be made by two people united in marriage.

Some people will just get into marriage without any apprehensions what might be the possible problems that will arise in the family; especially the young people who are very impulsive to get into it. Yes, the relationship would be abnormal and boring if there is no testing and crises; thus, it is usual for the marriage life to have problems because problems strengthen the relationship. But how about if the problem arises is regarding the sexual incompetence? What if one’s partner is not satisfied of what the other partner is doing or having a trauma in the past related to sex?

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Is there any solution for this? There are many factors why sex problems arise. Some of these are lack of sexual desire, problems with erections, premature ejaculation and retarded ejaculation, lack of orgasm in women, painful intercourse, vaginismus, and sexual trauma (see Boulware, Carol. “Sex Therapy: Is it for you? ” 2006). In this present generation, there are many broken marriages occurring because one of the reasons is the sex incompetence of the present partner. It cannot be denied that there are couples who quarreled so much because of the “sex” issue but how can this problem be resolved?

Due to this problem, experts present the counseling and psychotherapy in marriages to resolve the problems specifically in their sexual life. These kinds of treatments really help the marriage work well. The purposes of this study are to: (1) know what the difference between psychotherapy and counseling is and; (2) recognize how counseling and psychotherapy help the marriage who has sex problems. II. Discussion A. Psychotherapy and Counseling Most of the time, counseling and psychotherapy are terminologies that frequently interchange when used.

Actually, counselor would refer to advisor and it includes two individuals working together in order to provide solution for the dilemma. It is a treatment that has several types in giving advices (see Schimelpfening, Nancy. “What is the difference between Counseling and Psychotherapy? ” Psychotherapy 101, page 1). This would mean that counselor provides solutions to the couple who has sex problems by conducting a study related to case presented by the couple. Moreover, a licensed professional counselor named Deborah Reeves stated that: “A well-trained therapist understands the difference between counseling and psychotherapy.

In counseling the therapist focuses on the “here and now” reality situations and helps one become better equipped to deal with various life situations” (see Reeves, Deborah. “Differences between counseling and psychotherapy. Healing-Minds. com). On the other hand, psychotherapy denotes as the therapy of emotional and mental sickness. Psychotherapy includes a procedure, a connection between a patient and a therapist. A psychotherapist is an individual that is very good in: ? Listening the client carefully and sincerely ? Reflecting sympathetically ? Suggesting some views ? Giving comments and advices

? Assisting the client/clients to search and discover other options ? Guiding the client/clients in exploring the depths of experiences and emotions (see Jaffe, Jaelline and Segal, Jeanne. ” Psychotherapy and Relationship/Marriage Counseling”. Mental health Issues. Helpguide, July 14, 2004). These qualities of the psychotherapist help the married couples solve their sexual problems by tracing back what are the reasons behind why they encounter such dilemmas in their sex life. The psychotherapist sets different goals in order to identify the reasons why the marriage encounters sex problems.

The psychotherapy will: first, develop insights regarding the sex problems of the couple; second, learn to communicate more efficiently to the client/clients; third, learn to work out the interpersonal and internal incompatibilities; fourth, manage to lessen or relieve signs of emotional disturbances that may possibly be the reason why sex incompetence arises; fifth, alters actions and activities to develop relational, social and vocational functioning; sixth, client’s personal growth and improvement and; the last one is, rebuild the client’s life due to faulty sex experiences in early life (see Jaffe, Jaelline and Segal, Jeanne.

“Psychotherapy and Relationship/Marriage Counseling”. Mental health Issues. Helpguide, July 14, 2004). B. how do counseling and psychotherapy help marriage with sex problems? Marriage counseling is also known as couples’ therapy which assist married couples recognize, realize and work out the conflicts and develops their relationship. Marriage counseling and psychotherapy provide the couples the methods to make their communication better, understand differences, solve the problem and have a discussion in a healthy way. Marriage counseling is usually provided by therapists that have licensed who are called as marriage and family therapists.

Moreover, majority of the marriages are not perfect. Every individual has his own values, principles, and personal background in the relationship and more frequently, those characters do not always go with the partner’s character. Furthermore, marriage counseling can help the marriage life in dealing many issues especially in the marriage-sex-life that can create pressure in the relationship. Generally, marriage counseling normally put together the couples in joint therapy sessions where the counselor or therapist assists the couples identify, recognize and understand the root cause of their sex problems and attempt to solve them.

Both spouses will examine and analyze the good and the bad sides of their relationship that affect their sex drives. In this case, the marriage therapist or counselor will not show biases in any of the sides in the conflicts (see “Marriage Counseling: Working through relationship problems”. MayoClinic. com, tools for healthier life. October 17, 2006). Moreover, as mentioned earlier that psychotherapy is a process of treating emotional or mental sickness by means of chatting which concern the client’s condition and other issues that are related with a mental health expert.

It is also called as talk treatment, psychological therapy, counseling or just therapy. Same in counseling, psychotherapy sessions also help the couple able to learn regarding the root cause of their sex problems so that they can understand it, find out in how to pin point and change thoughts which influence their sex life, look for better methods to overcome and work out the sex problems and find out to established practical objectives for their sex life (see “Psychotherapy: An overview of the types of therapy. MayoClinic. com, tools for healthier lives. October 17, 2006). b. 1 Sex Therapy

Sex therapy is a specialized and virtuous treatment procedure to dilemmas of sexual expression and function. In a current research of the Journal of the American Medical Association stated that 3 out of 10 men and 4 out of 10 women have undergone sexual dilemmas. The problems that usually arise for men are the premature ejaculation, low sexual desire and dysfunction. While for women, the sexual problems are with arousal, pain through out the intercourse and low sexual desire. These kinds of matters are needed to be treated to avoid deeper problem that may lead to separation or divorce.

Individuals or married couples look for sex treatment after they attempted to solve their sex problems yet failed (see Boulware, Carol. “Sex Therapy: Is it for you? ” 2006). III. Conclusion Counseling and psychotherapy are such a big help to keep the relationship intact. It is really true that sex is one of the spices in a married life. Married people who have sex problems should not be hesitant to consult counseling and psychotherapy because it will help them identify and understand the root causes of their problem.

They are also given suggestions and solutions that make their sex life more exciting and interesting. Bibliography: 1. Jaffe, Jaelline and Segal, Jeanne. “Psychotherapy and Relationship/Marriage Counseling”. Mental health Issues. Helpguide, July 14, 2004. http://www. helpguide. org/mental/psychotherapy_relationship_marriage_counseling. htm 2. Schimelpfening, Nancy. “What is the difference between Counseling and Psychotherapy. ” Psychotherapy 101, page 1. http://depression. about. com/cs/psychotherapy/a/whatistherapy_2. htm 3. Reeves, Deborah. “Differences between counseling and psychotherapy.

Healing-Minds. com. http://www. healing-minds. com/vs. html 4. “Marriage Counseling: Working through relationship problems”. MayoClinic. com, tools for healthier life. October 17, 2006. http://www. mayoclinic. com/health/marriage-counseling/MH00104 5. “Psychotherapy: An overview of the types of therapy. MayoClinic. com, tools for healthier lives. October 17, 2006. http://www. mayoclinic. com/health/psychotherapy/MH00009 6. Boulware, Carol. “Sex Therapy: Is it for you? ” 2006. http://www. psychotherapist. net/sextherapy/sex-therapy. htm#anchor520639

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