Narrative Essay- the Crucible Abigail Williams
Before the accusations: Dear Diary, I hate Elizabeth by heart. I am calling for revenge, oh God please hear me. And if God is not willing to fulfill my desire I will have to use other aid.
I cannot stand the hurt in my bleeding heart anymore. John, oh John, it would be easier if you left your wife and flower out the purity of our love with me. We could leave; go to a place where we will be satisfied for the rest of our lives. But you broke my heart. I tried to couple with you. I still remember my accelerated heartbeat when our bodies came closer; you should have kissed me.
But you did not. Instead, you do not want to know anything about me. I truly thought that you would fall in my arms. And I did not feel guilty about our forbidden love for one breath of my life. I would do it again, just for you John, for our love. I never felt such true love in my life. I never had a mother who would love me no matter what happens. You were the only light in my life. And this light disappeared when you decided to turn your back on me. You cannot resist me, I know that. You still love me, you have to love me, and I am the only one for you.
So I will do whatever it takes to reunite with you again. I do not care about Elizabeth or her devilishly children, they should burn in hell. Oh yes, Elizabeth, you honest, well-behaved holy woman, you will perceive my choler. You will regret dismissing me. I am not the one to blame for the emptiness in your marriage. Besides I am the one of us two who makes him blessed to be a member of this world. I have a plan. I shall not rest until I receive what I deserve. People may die. But there is a price for every purchase in this world. In my case it is the craving for revenge.
Revenge, revenge, you are sweet bitter. I need to make sacrifices. Witchcraft is the problem’s solution. Tituba will help me. She is from the Barbados and she is informed about other spirits. We used to meet in the woods. We dance. Sometimes we get naked. Last time we drank chicken blood in order to kill Elizabeth Proctor. I think Parris saw us dancing in the woods. Betty is not doing well. But I do not care about her state. If she says a word about us drinking blood I will kill her. I already warned her. She will listen, she is bright. All the other maids do not mind to manipulate Salem.
It is a game. We will never give up because we started it. I am awfully enthused to see Elizabeth hang. Proctor is clever. He will know that I am behind all this mystic witchcraft. Maybe then he will know how important he is to me. Some people are going to die. I think we are going to name 19 people in the court. Mary Warren is a good girl, too good. She might tell the truth about everything. I need to be prepared. She will not be the one to destroy my genius plan. I already put too much effort in it. No one can stop me. No one can stop the girls from Salem. We are born to be successful.
We are born to get what we want. We will kill inhabitants of Salem. We will be the winners of this game I write the rules. I am the leader. After the witch trials: Dear Diary, John is dead. I never wanted him to die. I loved him too much. He is gone now. He will never come back. I offered him to leave with me, I had the money but he did not want to be with me. He did not want me, Abigail Williams. I miss him; I miss his warm hands and his soft skin. I miss how he looked at me. Elizabeth it is your entire fault. You should have died. Why him and not you? I tried my best.
I pointed at innocent people. Innocent people hanged because of us. We killed them. We had to kill them. They had to die. I enjoyed the relieving moment when someone was hanged. It felt right. I felt euphoric. They were the zenith of my life. I knew that Mary Warren would act Puritan. She is just like Elizabeth. I hate her. The Court did not believe her. We were too strong. She was too weak, poor girl. She was sweating like a hounded pig when the judge was questioning her. She needs to learn how to lie. When she knew that the judges would not believe her she gave up and came to our safe side.
But now John is dead because of her. I am selfish. I take my life over his and I do not regret it. John had his chance to come with me. It was his choice to hang. I want to live and I will. I will find another man, a better man who appreciates my effort and love. I will be happy and blessed. Until then I will do everything to hide the truth from the light. Salem will never be clever enough to hunt the actual witches of the town. We are responsible for the death of 19 human lives. We are beasts. Try to catch us. The game goes on.